One minute facebook sanity savers

sanity-saving-facebook-tipsThere’s no denying that facebook has changed the way we interact with each other. We can now feel more connected with people we cherish who we never get to see, keep up to date with news and areas of interest and enjoy a laugh or a WTF or two. However, on the flipside facebook can also resemble a 24 hour soap opera – an endless source of parenting competition, passive aggressiveness and all out blowups. Whichever is your experience – and it’s possibly a bit of both – there’s also no denying that facebook is one giant time suck. You just go in for an innocent check of the news feed and you emerge hours later armed with a whole heap of useless information and a little bit traumatised by the views harboured by other members of your extended friendship group or on pages you like. Or maybe that’s just me.

I had a facebook break of around three weeks or so at the start of the year and I must say I felt freer than I had in a long time. By not updating my status, I was free to be in the moment instead of describing it. With no pressure to ‘like’ what was served up in front of me by facebook, I could use that time to do other things I like and see people I like instead. I felt more mindful of moments, less distracted and more present. Since then, I’ve looked at ways that I can enjoy the benefits of the connectedness of facebook without being completely addicted to its juicy gossipy nothingness.

So, in under one minute join me and:

1. Delete your facebook mobile app: This is a hangover from my self-imposed facebook ban. Get rid of that damn thing. Yes, I know it’s handy when you’re waiting, killing time or on public transport but ask yourself if there would be something else better you could spend that time doing. For us mums, that may be as simple as closingour eyes and taking a few deep breaths. Yes, you may miss out on something – that was the overwhelming fear I had when I first did it – but your life will be a lot richer for it. You’ll also be protected from making spur of the moment updates that you may later regret when the heat of the moment is over, so WIN-WIN!

2. Defriend, hide and unlike: We all like a facebook related whinge from time to time about how facebook always changes the rules and doesn’t serve up the things we really want to see. And that’s true to an extent, but there’s also facilities there for you to customise your experience by getting rid of your facebook deadwood by defriending, hiding from newsfeed and unliking. Look, it’s uncomfortable to start with but once you’ve started it’s totally liberating. If you did it all at once, it would definitely take more than one minute, so my strategy is to take action with one or two a day. It may be a page you’ve outgrown (unlike) or a friend that’s facebook presence is leaving you feeling less than positive (hide or unlike depending on how extreme it is) or someone who’s views you find so repugnant you’re actually not sure how you ended up friends in the first place (unlike!).

3. Don’t take it personally: It’s evident that people take a lot of things personally on facebook. Sometimes it’s hard not to. But you do have a choice. If you see an annoying post, just scroll on past and definitely don’t read the comments, they’re sure to be even more annoying, and maybe consider taking a step two if it’s a repeat offence. Also keep in mind that you’re also potentially annoying people, and that’s OK! You don’t have to be all things to all people. I’m more than aware of the irony of this post showing up in your facebook feed and annoying you too. In that case, just use your mouse or finger to click past me and unfollow too. I won’t be offended, honest!

4. Cultivate those things you do love: Love a facebook page or a person? Let them know! These are the relationships on facebook you should be cultivating. Throw them a random like, comment or even a direct message. An out of the blue hello or a message to tell them you love what they do would make their day and make you feel warm and fuzzy at the same time. It will also help ensure you see more of them around your news feed.

5. Enjoy facebook mindfully: Remember when you had to log in to a computer to enjoy facebook? Go old school for awhile. Boil the kettle and pour yourself a tea and sit down and have a read of your favourite pages, groups or what your favourite people got up to today. Social media is absolutely constant and you’ll never really keep up with everything, which can leave us feeling anxious if we  dip into it a lot. Slow down your facebook consumption and I promise you’ll enjoy the experience much more!

I’d love to hear how you go if you try any of these, so please drop me a line in the comments. Or if you have any other quick tips to keep facebook and your sanity. I’d love it if you could relate to any of this that you use the buttons below to share it. 

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5 thoughts on “One minute facebook sanity savers

  1. Thanks B – I highly recommend Step 2! A few weeks ago I realised I had Facey-friended a lot of people whom I barely knew from school and random workplaces and who were now clogging up my facey feed – they had to go!! So began the arduous but totally worth it cleaning up task and now on the rare occasions I do log onto Facey I only see updates from my nearest and dearest yay!!!

    On a side note: I have experienced some backlash from a few of my friends who are devout Facebookers who are not happy with my lack of Facebook checking. See I’ve switched teams – I’m an Instagrammer and therefore I rarely visit Facebook. But for these few apparently Facebook is the ONLY way we can communicate – don’t worry about calling each other, sending an email, texting, seeing each other in person or heaven forbid sending a letter. To that I say let’s get REAL and starting connecting with each other in a meaningful way 😉

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    • Good on you Mel … perhaps another post on reestablishing contact with people outside of facebook is needed. I think we can fall into the trap of thinking it’s a quick way to keep in touch when in fact it eats into hours and does lack meaning. x

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  2. Hi Belinda,
    I wiped out Facebook totally over a year ago, and it was SO liberating it’s not funny. Stress removed from my life.

    One downside is when friends are peeved they have to send me links to their photos now. The good friends get over it quickly 🙂

    The other “downside “is that my phone now beeps at me regularly because half the apps won’t work without Facebook. This just reaffirms my conviction that Facey was taking over my world, and I like my world much more without it.

    Miss CupOTea (ex addict)

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    • So good to hear that banning the FB has led to less stress in your life, MCoT! I have toyed with a total ban also, but want to keep my blog page so I’m trying to find a sane work around! Thank God (or Zuckerberg!) for the FB pages app, letting me manage my blog page without being pulled into the depths of FB proper.

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  3. Found your site on Google. This is a cool post. I’d like to see you take the main idea from this article and crteae another second article, and maybe you could embed a vid, also?

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